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iesikaWhile I'm posting unposted fic.... This one's timestamped December 10th.
This was supposed to be one of three Variations on a Theme. That theme? Tim Gets Naked. Kon gets a shock. I'm not sure now whether I'm going to write the rest. There are other things demanding my attention. But I liked this, and I even had it typed and formatted, believe it or not, so I decided to post-spam my flist today. I've got two notebooks here full of unfinished little things, and I'm about to start with the megaposting.
This is a Young Justice fic, which means the kids are young, and there is nudity, but it is very innocent. Set...um...around the time the team moves into the old resort? -ish? It's very silly and kind of lame, but I really, really like Bart in this, so I'm posting it anyway. I need an I <3 Impulse icon.
The fight was going surprisingly well, right up until the point it went so predictably wrong. Kon, Cassie and Suzie had lured the Volatile Villainous Vixen (as she apparently called herself) away from her intended victims by the simple and expedient method of making fun of her name (because really), her costume (he’d left that one up to Cassie), and her absolutely ridiculous superpower (the ability to hock one seriously toxic loogie) while hovering just outside her range like carrots on a stick.
Luckily, her aim was pretty poor, though her range was pretty impressive for a chick. Once they’d got her out of the town, it was just a matter of dodging and distracting until Impulse could cram her mouth full of crackers long enough for Robin to slap some kind of bat-bondage gear onto her face and get her arms up behind her. She was muttering and cursing behind the gag when Kon and Cassie landed. As Robin pulled her cuffs tight and stepped back, she looked directly at Kon, with this really mean look, and then –
Well, then she exploded.
“Oh, gross!” Cassie shrieked. She had the stuff (which, thankfully, was some sort of greenish goo rather than, like, giblets and things) on her face and in her hair, though her goggles seemed to have protected her eyes. Kon himself had been splashed pretty thoroughly. The two of them looked a lot worse than Robin (who seemed to have gotten his cape up in time) and way worse than Bart (who had probably dodged most of the mess). The goop had, of course, gone right through Suzie.
This didn’t seem fair, and Kon had opened his mouth to say so (after carefully scraping the gunk off the lower half of his face so it wouldn’t get in his mouth), when Bart started wailing.
“Owowowowowowowow-” he shouted, circling them at speed. Kon looked down and stared in dismay at his quickly dissolving costume. He glanced at Cassie, but she seemed more occupied with the goggles melting on her face.
“Impulse!” Robin barked. He did something at his throat and his cape dropped to the ground. It was smoking. “Vibrate. Now!”
“What? OwowowowowowOh!” Bart blurred, and then he was back. His costume was full of tiny holes over painfully pink skin.
Robin’s hands went to his belt, which hit the puddle that had been his cape a moment later. “The harbor is three miles to the south,” He said to Cassie and Kon. “Both of you, head there.” And Robin was stripping, right there in the field. The red part of his costume opened like a shell. It was already full of holes. “No modesty,” he ordered, “we don’t know what this stuff is.”
“But-“ I’m super, Kon wanted to say, but…his skin was kind of tingling and Cassie was clawing the plastic away from her face and kind of whimpering.
By the time Robin barked “Now!” (and yanked off a boot) Kon had Cassie by the hand and was dragging her at top speed toward the harbor.
They hit the water with so much force it felt like plowing into the ground. Cassie started scrubbing her face immediately, and Kon used his TTK to tug at what was left of her clothes until they tore free. His own costume was barely a few tatters at that point, but he pulled that off, too. He turned his back on Cassie and started scrubbing.
A trough tore through the water a few yards to his left, and then there was Robin, bobbing to the surface. He was still wearing the stupid mask.
“I didn’t get any on my face,” he said, at Kon’s look. Then, with a glance at Cassie he added, “you both did. Be sure to flush your eyes, ears, nose and mouth.”
Then Robin took a deep breath and dove underwater.
“I’m back!” Bart announced, as if they couldn’t tell from the spray. He sunk into the water when he stopped running , dropping an armload of bath things. “Robin told me to get- Where’s Robin? Didhedrown?!” He dove under the water before Kon could answer. A rubber duck floated by.
Robin surfaced a few feet away and grabbed a loofah.
“Dude, what were you doing?”
“What I told you to do. Would you like to loose your vision and hearing? Maybe your sense of smell?”
I’m super, Kon wanted to argue, but while his skin didn’t actually hurt, it was way more sensitive than usual. So he dunked and deliberately snorted water up his nose.
Bart surfaced, gasping, as Kon was shaking water out of his hair. “You didn’t drown!” he shouted, and sort of flopped through the water to tackle Robin in a hug.
And it hit Kon, all of a sudden, that Robin was naked. And Kon was naked. And behind him, about ten feet away, Cassie was naked.
“Holy shit,” he said, “we’re skinny dipping.”
“We are?” Bart asked. “I’m not.” There was a half second of splashing that left him and Robin spinning slowly in a vague whirlpool. “Now I am!”
And now Bart was naked, too.
“Impulse,” Robin began, but Bart was splashing around them happily with the rubber duck.
“Dude, we are skinny dipping in broad daylight and there are people on the docks.” They were maybe fifty yards from shore, but people had definitely noticed something going on. A crowd was gathering. “How are we going to get out of here?”
“We could send Impulse for clothes,” Cassie suggested. Kon felt kind of rude, keeping his back to her while she was speaking, but he was afraid to turn around. Robin, the jackass, was treading water and looking at her over Kon’s shoulder. With the mask on, you couldn’t even tell where he was looking.
“We could-“ Robin began, then smiled.
“What?”
“Thank you for the smoke screen, Secret,” Robin said to the mist that was drifting toward them over the water.
The mist developed a face. “My pleasure,” Suzie cooed – freaking cooed – at Robin.
“Right,” he said. “There’s an island one mile south of here with no permanent residents. It should be deserted at this time of year. Impulse,” Bart stopped swimming in circles, “put your clothes back on and head back to headquarters. We each need a change of clothes. I have a spare suit in a compartment behind the computer console. I’d like it if you could get my wrecked uniform out of that field, too. If it’s still corrosive, bury it. Meet us with the clothes on the island over there.” He pointed across the water.
“Okay,” Bart said, and was gone in a splash and a spray.
Cassie mostly swam under the water. Kon had tried to get a grip on Robin and speed him along, but Robin had struggled until he’d let go (he was really the last person Kon wanted to wrestle naked underwater with short of, like, a supervillain). Robin was a fast swimmer, for a human, and his form was perfect as far as Kon could tell (or would have been if his shiny white ass would just stay under the water, not that Suzie seemed to mind), but a mile of open water was a mile of open water, even if they were going with the tide. Kon hung back and kept an eye on him, so he could rescue him when he finally crapped out.
Only he never did.
“Where were you guys?” Impulse demanded as they neared the shore. “That took forever! I went home and got my homework but I finished it so I went and got my gameboy-“
“We’d have been here sooner, only somebody wouldn’t accept any super-assistance.”
Robin, damn him, didn’t even look tired. “If you’d towed at speed your wake would have drowned me.”
“Yeah, right.”
“I brought clothes,” Bart said “And towels. And,” he streaked away and back, and there was a small explosion that somehow resolved itself into a campfire, “I brought hot chocolate but you took forever so I drank it but I’ll make some more.”
“Sounds good, Impulse. Is the island clear?”
“There were some fishermen and I talked to them for a while, but they all left.”
“Good job, Bart,” Kon said, grinning.
“I put Cassie’s stuff on the other side of the island because she’s a girl.”
Kon rolled his eyes (hadn’t he been a perfect gentleman?), but Cassie said, “Thanks,” and swam off to get her things.
“Go with her,” Robin told Suzie.
“But I could make a smokescreen for you.”
Right. And wrap herself all around the naked Robin.
“Secret. Please. Stick with Wonder Girl.”
She sighed a misty sigh and floated away.
Kon and Robin looked at each other for a moment while Bart bustled around the fire. Then Robin gave him an amused sort of smirk, like a dare, and went ashore.
And Kon wouldn’t have looked, as he followed up onto the beach, except for that smirk, like Kon couldn’t handle a little nudity, and because Kon was really, really hoping Robin had a big, fat, hairy mole on his ass he could bring up next time Cissie and Suzie started giggling.
“Shit!” he said, louder than he’d meant to. Hell, he hadn’t meant to say it at all. But Robin-
Robin was covered in scars.
They were worst on his legs and his upper arms, but his back and his shoulders were criss-crossed with marks, and there were four parallel lines across the top of his ass that looked like maybe they’d been caused by claws.
“Oh my God,” he said. Robin had frozen when he’d shouted. He turned around now. “Rob,” Kon said. “Oh my God, Rob.”
His front was maybe worse.
“Is that,” he started. His eyes darted down to the thick, severe-looking curve that stopped just short of his- He jerked his yes back to Robin’s shoulder. “Is that one from a bullet? You got shot?”
And then Rob blew his mind, because he didn’t even glance at the round, puckered scar on his shoulder. He looked down at his leg, instead, and there was another one.
“Yeah,” Robin said, and picked up a towel.
“Jesus fuck,” Kon said.
How was he not dead?
Robin dried himself efficiently, starting with his hair and working his way down. He kept his gaze on Kon’s face (as best as Kon could tell, with the damned mask) the whole time, as if they weren’t both standing there bare-ass naked. Kon couldn’t stop following the towel with his eyes. Robin’s ribs were kind of green and yellow down one side, from old bruises. There were two rows of stitches on his right thigh. The scar that curved below his hipbone, across his pelvis, that almost-
“I was very grateful to be wearing a cup,” Robin said. Kon’s eyes darted back to his face. “I wear a lot more armor than I used to, and I’ve had a lot more training. A lot of these are pretty old.”
The nasty looking chemical burn on his arm was brand new. It had to hurt like a bitch.
“Wowyouhavealotofscars,” Bart said as he zipped up with their clothes. “I found the compartment you said to but it started beeping when I tried to open it, so I went to Gotham and ran around until Batman showed up and asked what I was doing and I told him you needed new clothes because you were skinny dipping but you left the mask on so it was okay. He gave me this one.”
“Thanks, Bart,” Robin said. He sounded amused. “Why don’t you go order us some pizza?” We’ll meet you back at base.”
“Allright! Pizzawoo!” Bart said, and vanished.
Robin started getting dressed. There were a lot of layers and a lot of armor, and Kon was kind of surprised by how quickly he got it all on.
“Kon,” Robin said, as he pulled on a glove.
“Huh?”
“Are you going to get dressed?”
Kon blinked, remembered the jeans in his hand, and was dressed by the time Robin picked up his other glove – only they were really more like gauntlets, weren’t they? Christ, no wonder he wore so much armor.
Robin laughed, quietly.
“Are they all from, y’know, work and stuff, or were you in a car crash, or a plane crash, or a war zone as a kid, or….” He trailed off.
“Hm,” Robin said, thinking. He held out his ungloved hand. There was a long white line diagonal across his palm. “I got that one off a broken bottle in an alley when I was nine. I treated it myself, so it got a little infected. Took forever to heal.”
Kon swallowed. He watched Robin pull the gauntlet on and flex his fingers.
“You, ah,” You’re human. You’re mortal. You’re crazy.
Robin just looked at him.
“Are you guys decent?” Cassie shouted. She and Suzie were headed their way up the beach. She stopped beside the fire. Her face was pink, and lightly peeling, like a day old sunburn.
“How are your eyes?” Robin asked.
“Fine,” she said, “but I’m going to need new goggles. And some serious moisturizer and deep conditioning. I thought I smelled cocoa?”
“I think Bart drank it all, again,” Robin said. He kicked sand up over the fire until it went out. “Everyone fit for the trip home?”
“Yeah,” Kon said. “Yeah. I’ll give you a lift.”
END.
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no subject
Date: 2009-06-18 01:50 pm (UTC)This was a lot of fun :D
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Date: 2009-08-28 04:46 am (UTC)And then Rob blew his mind, because he didn’t even glance at the round, puckered scar on his shoulder. He looked down at his leg, instead, and there was another one.
Love this line.
“You, ah,” You’re human. You’re mortal. You’re crazy.
Robin just looked at him.
Another great bit.
“I got that one off a broken bottle in an alley when I was nine..."
...when I was stalking Batman and Robin with a camera and not getting caught. (If only Kon knew HOW crazy Tim is, LOL...)
Thanks for sharing!
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Date: 2009-08-28 04:53 am (UTC)I'm glad you liked this. I miss YJ, too.
Tim's "normal boy" scar is even more proof of his craziness than the line-of-duty ones (and kind of reinforces his having been part of the Bat-craziness pretty much his whole life). I think Kon would run screaming at this point if he knew.
Eventually I'm going to write the other two parts to this. >.
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Date: 2009-08-28 05:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 05:50 am (UTC)IS IT JAIME? THAT'S THE ONLY PERSON I CAN THINK OF WITH POWERS THAT ELECTRONICS WON'T MESS WITH TOO BAD????
(UGH FAMILY OVER MAKE THEM GO AWAY)
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Date: 2009-08-28 05:58 am (UTC)WHO AT THE TOWER HAS TAKEN ROBIN'S CLOTHES OFF BEFORE?
Also, in my head, all the Bats are, like, completely hairless, except for Bruce. Possibly this is all about my own kinks, but I justify it with the chafing thing. Skin tight clothes and body hair don't mix. Also, they're pretty much drawn that way, especially when we see them in the showers.
Bruce shaves, rather than using electrolysis, This is the only way to explain why he sometimes has tons of chest hair and sometimes is waxy smooth.
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Date: 2009-08-28 06:05 am (UTC)Yeah, I know cyclists that shave because of the chaffing thing. And I totally prefer smooth Timmy and Dick <3
And that also makes lots of sense. Because clearly Bruce SOMETIMES needs chest hair. For.. reasons.. or something/
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Date: 2009-08-28 06:18 am (UTC)Er. That's Bruce's reasons, not who's stripped Robin. Though he almost certainly has.
YOU ONLY DON'T KNOW BECAUSE YOU'RE FORGETING THE OTHER ROBINS! SHAME SHAME! SOMEONE IN WINICK'S TITANS HAS UNDRESSED A ROBIN WITH GREAT FREQUENCY.
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Date: 2009-08-28 06:20 am (UTC)I DON'T KNOW. WINICKS RUN WAS SHIT? WHEN WAS IT EVEN. WHO WAS THE LINE UP?
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Date: 2009-08-28 06:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 06:39 am (UTC)WAS IT KORY
ALL I CAN THINK OF IS KORY GETTING DICK NAKED
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Date: 2009-08-28 06:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 06:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 06:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 06:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-28 06:50 am (UTC)Jay can go with Donna, but Roy, whatno.
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Date: 2009-09-10 06:03 pm (UTC)Jay can absolutely go with Roy! And by that I mean Titans era Jay and Roy, not current. I wouldn't put Donna with current Jay either, though. But if Jay ever Snaps Out Of It, he and Roy can hook up again!
Come on, Speedy and Jay!Robin! They're both slightly jackassy, irreverent, and much more worldly than their peers. Jay was a
prostistreet kid, Roy was a junkie. Roy had a rock band! Jay smoked! They would have had beers together and joked about what a stick-in-the-mud boyscout Dickie is, and then they would have made out.And after Jay Snaps Out Of It, Roy might well be more understanding than the Bats - he's killed people, too.
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Date: 2009-09-10 09:52 pm (UTC)My next coment_fic prompt is probably going to be Roy!Speedy/Jay!Robin now.
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Date: 2009-09-10 10:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-09-10 10:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-22 01:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-23 08:49 pm (UTC)Thanks. ^__^
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Date: 2010-02-04 04:06 pm (UTC)It's a bit harder to see Crazy!Tim during the YJ era (canon-wise), but this works very well and more.
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Date: 2010-04-26 04:40 pm (UTC)I would put more concret thoughts in this comment but the giddyness my brain is producing right now would probably just freak you out.
This was awesome though.
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Date: 2010-04-26 07:01 pm (UTC)Also any excuse to have Tim knock Kon out of his paradigm a little... that's one of my favorite things to write.
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Date: 2010-04-27 03:21 pm (UTC)implications, he he) I seriously can not comprehend why they have to piss all over their characters all the time. I mean, I enjoy my angst but this is getting ridiculous.